Grief Before Loss

Anticipatory grief differs from conventional grief in that conventional grief occurs after a loss, and anticipatory grief occurs before an impending loss. Coping with anticipatory grief can pose unique challenges. As Dr. Wolfelt, director of the Center for Loss and Life Transition, observes in this helpful article, "With conventional grief, because the loss already has happened, you can start to heal — but that healing process is harder to start while you’re still anticipating a loss that’s to come." 

 

Wolfelt notes that having control is an important value in our society, and anticipatory grief involves an unavoidable surrender of that control. His advice on healthy coping is to "embrace and express" the wide range of emotions inherent in anticipatory grief. This expression can take many forms. For example, a friend of ours chose to write a beautiful poem while suffering from anticipatory grief related to the expected, eventual passing of her beloved mother-in-law. What helps you?

 

Leave-Taking

 

I don't want you to leave us in August

When we bask in the sun

When we sit by the pool at Lisa's and eat watermelon

When we relish seed spitting contests and the brief gleam of fireflies.

 

I don't want you to leave us in fall

When the hickory trees spread golden above us

When it's your son's and my anniversary and I remember

When we savored your lasagna at our rehearsal dinner.

 

I don't want you to leave us at Thanksgiving

When the fire crackles in the firepit

When the family gobbles turkey off your pinecone china plates

When you'd gotten up so early to cook.

 

I don't want you to leave us at Christmas

When bubble lights gleam beside the cardinal and pickle ornaments

When Nat King Cole and Bing Crosby croon Christmas carols

When you tidy up discarded wrapping paper almost before we drop it.

 

I don't want you to leave us in winter

When the trees' skeletal leaves stretch to the sky

When the pink camelias bloom

When we share strong coffee and gossip.

 

I don't want you to leave us in March

When the leaves are so bright they hurt my eyes

When your green thumb rescues my wilting potting plants

When the restored fern sits perkily on your windowsill.

 

I don't want you to leave us at Easter

When the fragrant lilies bloom

When Ben and Izzy search the bushes of Rob's backyard for fuchsia and lemon yellow eggs

When songs resound from Woodville United Methodist Curch.

 

I don't want you to leave us on Mother's Day

When we honor all your sacrifices

When silly cards and cheerful tulips coax a smile onto your face

When you wear your blue flowered blouse with the necklace I made you.

 

When pale June sunsets fill the skies

When it's the time of your own choosing

Then we will say our devoted goodbyes

Then you may leave us.

 

~Elaine Cochrane Hebenthal

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